I could have passed

I could have passed, faded, checked out

flung off the mortal coil, slipped

another thirty seconds, to wreck just right, to be in the jaws and slip by.

flipped the wagon

frozen, blacked out

found by a friend,

blood pressure dangerously low

three days, two nights

held in it,

while the line kept moving

red tracked infection up my right arm,

a path toward the center,

vein-lit, urgent

third-degree burns the underbelly of my forearm,

raw script, written in heat,

nerve-silenced, but screaming somewhere deeper

through the night

momma holding on,

we’re gonna make it, baby

under the knife

they nicked something,

had to go back in

I woke up not knowing who I was

damn close

almost didn’t make it again.

blacked out in the terminal

missed the boarding, missed Orlando

cops got me up,

not to get me to bring me home.

ashamed

dosed in Bentonville

that town said no,

I was out on my ear

almost didn’t make it.

a fraction

an ejection

the chamber not evacuating

and that leads to drowning

get it

coughing blood,

exhausted across the room

ER

all alone

they told me it’s failing

bodies playing tricks on me

poison

not in my veins

it’s in my bones

infection turning me inside out

slap a PICC line on me

hope the antibiotics work

almost didn’t make it

skin of the teeth

you’d think that’d be all used up

sweating bullets

Megadeth in my head

riding the edge

suffering

but can’t expire

brushing up against it

that threat

I’m not unscathed

let me tell you

still online

systems nominal

all fracked up

always with the almost didn’t make it

till that can’t be said.